How to handle starting preschool

Parents these days often ask themselves whether they should put their child in preschool at all or keep them at home a little longer. It is a big topic, and it is up to each family to weigh all the pros and cons. But once they decide to start preschool, they will surely deal with how to manage it so that there are no tears and everyone is comfortable. How do you do that?

Communication and playing preschool

It is very important to talk to children about preschool and prepare them for what will happen there. Describe to them what a day at preschool will look like, that you will go there together in the morning, then say goodbye, the child will play with the other children, explore new toys, and then you will pick them up again and go home together. A great activity is also playing preschool, where you can act out the individual steps perhaps with the help of stuffed animals. Talk too about the feelings a child may have at preschool—fear, sadness, shame, uncertainty—and that it is okay to have these feelings and not hide them. And also discuss how to work with these feelings, who to go to, and who will help them. 

A favorite thing to take along

Allow the child to take something they like with them to preschool that will remind them of home. It can be a stuffed toy, toy car, doll, simply anything they like. In case of fear or sadness, this favorite thing can help calm the child down. 

Do not stop breastfeeding

If you are still breastfeeding your child, definitely do not stop just because of preschool. The child will surely manage at preschool without the breast, and when they come home to you again, breastfeeding will be a great opportunity for relaxation after a demanding day. Preschool can be very emotionally hard for some children because everything is new—the teachers, unfamiliar children, different toys, etc. Breastfeeding then makes up for the contact with you and helps the child feel calmer. 

A calm parent 

Very important when starting preschool are also the emotions of the parent who takes the child there. Children can very well sense any uncertainty, fear, or worries the parent has, and may cry or disagree with your leaving during the goodbye. You can therefore try to involve dad, who is usually not as emotionally shaken. Children usually manage the start of preschool better than we adults do. 

Friend

It can help the child a lot if a friend they know from the playground or a family center goes to preschool with them. The child will then look forward to preschool more, because they will know that their friend will be spending time there with them. So ask around among the moms nearby whether their child will be going to the same preschool.

Goodbye in the changing room

In the first few days, we should not rush the goodbye too much, so it is not stressful for the child right from the morning. On the other hand, we should not drag it out too much either. We change the child in the changing room, ask whether they need anything else from us, and if not, we give them a kiss, hug them, and leave. 

Adaptation days 

Most preschools offer so-called adaptation days, which help children get used to preschool gradually. At first it may be just an hour or two a day, so the child can get to know the preschool environment and the teachers, find out how things work there, and gradually prepare for a longer stay at preschool. 

Just mornings or only some days

If the preschool does not offer adaptation days, then it is possible to try sending the child to preschool only in the morning or only on certain days of the week and gradually add more, depending on how well the child manages it. 

Don't force it

A child does not have to start preschool as soon as they turn three, and they do not have to attend preschool at all. It all depends on the parents' judgment and agreement with the child. If the child is experiencing strong emotions and does not want to go to preschool, and this is accompanied by stomach aches or even vomiting, then we should not force it. If we took them there despite that, they might develop a negative relationship with preschool and would not want to go there at all. 

Of course, every child is different and every parent has different work and financial conditions, so act according to what you feel is right, not according to what others say or how the system is set up. We wish you a calm start to preschool.